Working Backwards

Well, it's now the two week mark past graduation and three weeks since my last post. I suppose the best place to start, at least for me, is at the present and work backwards.

It's been a very strange transition between Amerilife and non-Amerilife. Besides the obvious lack of my ten-person support system, I've been appreciating a lot that I've taken for granted. I haven't been able to wake up early for the past week, and have been sleeping in until at least 9 every morning. I first attributed it to jet lag and more recently to having a bed where I could stretch out, but it may be a bit more complicated.

I definately miss the sense of purpose that life provided in AmeriCorps, having something to do and for a good reason. A comfortable life isn't all that comfortable if you're just bumbling by. I can see why some retired folks just sort of drift from TV to fridge after leaving their work. I'm in need of a job or a project to work on to keep me active.

I've also been feeling a strange feeling toward my hometown, or at least an unease by who I've been surrounded by for the first few days. It was a large culture shock on Friday to go to a big concert at Conner Prairie to watch the Symphony and a Beatles cover band. After being surrounded for 10 months by young diverse people from all over who are nuts about service and are living paycheck to paycheck, it was strange to be in a homogonized crowd full of middle-aged well-to-do white Hoosiers. A year ago I would have been in my element, but now I feel a bit like an outsider. For many of them, I'm sure that was the ideal of a good time-- and it was. The band was good, the sunset was lovely, and the food was from Chic-fil-a. But for some reason, I realized that it just wasn't my scene. Maybe I've spent enough time with the weirdos of America that I've become one of them.

It's been said time and time again by many different people, but 'you can't come home again'. Either you change or home changes, but either way it's never quite the same.